Stellenberg HoëRskool (City Of Cape Town)

Stellenberg Hoërskool, Northern Suburbs royalty, sitting there charging R43,747 for Grade 12 like you are a private school with a polo team and a swimming coach named Christiaan. Bru, you are a PUBLIC school. The WCED is technically your boss and you are out here invoicing parents like you are Bishops. For that price, load shedding should not even be allowed to look at your gates. 1,498 learners and 72 teachers, so your ratio is 20.8 to 1, which means your teacher is basically a taxi driver, everyone squeeze in, we will sort out the seating later. One educator, twenty kids, all trying to understand trig at the same time. Jy weet hoe is dit. And the school's own description is so dry it could have been written by the same person who does municipal water notices. "No boarding facilities." Bra, that is the most exciting sentence in your whole paragraph. But look, Northern Suburbs people will tell you Stellenberg is THE school, the one everyone wants to get into, the one they brag about at braais from Brackenfell to Bellville. And maybe they are right. Nearly 1,500 learners keep showing up, parents keep paying those fees without crying too loudly, and the school is still standing. That counts for something out here past the Huguenot Tunnel side of Cape Town. Overall verdict: Expensive for a public school, packed like a taxi on a Friday afternoon, but clearly doing something right because half the Northern Suburbs would fight their neighbour to get a spot here.