Linksfield Primary School (Johannesburg)

Linksfield Primary. A public school in Johannesburg with 348 kids and only 13 teachers. Thirteen. That is not a staff room, that is a WhatsApp group. One teacher is basically responsible for 27 kids at a time, which means by the time she gets to the kid in the back row, it is already the next term. The WCED would never, but Gauteng said hold my beer and made it someone else's problem. Twenty-seven kids per teacher means your educator is not teaching anymore, she is surviving. She woke up, looked at that register, and decided today is a DVD day. You know the one. She rolled in the TV on the trolley with the squeaky wheel and pressed play on something from 2008 and called it Life Orientation. Meanwhile thirty kids are arguing about whose turn it is to sit near the fan. Look, 348 learners is not small, but it is not big enough to hide in either. You thought you could skive off behind the tuck shop, but nah, there are only so many kids here and everyone knows everyone. The teacher knew your older sibling, your cousin, and probably your mom. There is no anonymity at Linksfield Primary. You are just a legacy problem waiting to happen. Overall verdict: A school held together by thirteen very tired, very brave human beings who deserve a Nandos voucher and a long weekend, but somehow the kids turned out alright.